March 5th, 2011

сегодняшнее пополнение Wordrivegame

  • What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."*
  • It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it.
  • Why is a bra singular and panties plural?
  • Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!
  • Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
  • Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia: Fear of long words.
  • The difference between divorce and legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money.
  • What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.
  • Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.
  • Getting married for sex is like buying a 747 for the free peanuts.
  • They call it "pms" because "mad cow disease" was already taken.
  • Sex is like software: For every one who pays for it there are hundreds getting it for free.
  • Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.